Hi jury and Kovaze. 😊
THIS IS A LOT, I KNOW 😂, BUT BEFORE YOU NEG THIS... PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO READ IT.
If you'd told me on Day 1 that I'd be sitting here at Final 3, I probably would've laughed... and then immediately started overthinking how you came to that conclusion.
When I saw the cast at the beginning of the season, ngl, I was intimidated AF. I remember thinking, okay... my goal is just to make jury. I know my game wasn't quiet because, honestly, I didn't feel like I had the luxury of playing "under the radar" like some... cough cough Mr. Koolness234. 😂 I felt like I HAD to win competitions. I HAD to make big moves. I HAD to get a ton of blood on my hands. And somewhere along the way, I picked up a few titles too.
I've been called a snake, a bitch, nasty, dumb, been told I was dead to some of you... I think I'm only missing "cunt" to complete the collection. 😂 Honestly, if we're handing out awards, I think I checked off most of the villain bingo card.
The thing is... Big Brother isn't about playing a game that makes everyone happy. If it were, I would've packed my bags weeks ago. It's about making the decisions that give you the best chance to be sitting there on finale night, even when those decisions are unpopular. I never expected every move I made to be liked, but I did expect every move to have a purpose.
And I do want to say one thing directly to all of you (jury). If you were on the receiving end of one of my decisions, I want you to know that I don't take that lightly. I understand those moves affected real people, and I never forgot that, even when I believed they were the right moves for my game.
There were a lot of weeks where I felt like I was playing from the minority, and I knew I wasn't the first choice for many of the strongest players in this game... honestly, many of you sitting on this jury.
This cast was absolutely stacked. We had competition beasts like Chris, downeaster, Spartagow, and Shrimp. We had incredible strategic minds like Riddler, Koolness, Tea, and Justini. We had amazing social players like Greedy, Kali, Chris, Summer, Thumper, Charlitos, BigBryy99 and Metro. We had people with instincts, especially Aleksa, KaliMinaj, Tea, and Yawnha. We had resilient players who I knew would never stopped fighting like Nicky and Brxanne. Every single one of the cast members brought something different to this game, and I genuinely mean that.
There were so many weeks where winning wasn't about padding my résumé, it was about surviving another week. If I didn't take my shot when I had it, I wasn't protecting my game... I was throwing it away. That's why, when I had power, I wasn't afraid to actually use it. I didn't hide behind it, and I didn't waste it. Every move I made was the one I believed gave me the best chance to still be sitting here tonight.
And listen... I'm not going to stand here and tell you I played a perfect game, because I didn't. (This speech being this long is probably Exhibit A. 😂) I made mistakes. I misread people. I overthought things. I made decisions that hurt people. But every single time, I adjusted, I learned, and I kept fighting. I never stopped fighting for my position in this game.
More than anything, I'm proud that I was brave enough to stay true to the game I believed I had to play. I didn't make moves just to make moves. I made the decisions I believed gave me the best chance to survive another week against what I truly believe was one of the strongest casts I've ever played with. Whether you agreed with those decisions or not, I hope you can see they always came from a place of trying to win this game, never from a place of trying to hurt any of you personally.
I don't know if I'll make Final 2, but I can promise you this: if I do, I'll fight just as hard to earn your vote as I fought to earn my seat here in Final 3. My goal with this speech was simply to explain my side of the story and connect all of those pieces together.
Thank you for hearing me out. And if you actually made it all the way down here... you're a real one. ❤️
koolness234
