Hoeassgirl’s Plea to Win

Playing Outcasted wasn’t easy. I’m on the heavier side, and my thumbs struggled to tap the right buttons in the games. But I still showed up. Every round. Every time. I was a ghost in the chat room, present but unheard. I’m schizophrenic, and because of that, speaking to people is never simple for me. The voices drown out everyone else, telling me to quit, telling me I don’t belong, telling me to disappear from Kovaze entirely. Sean Aconda poured every ounce of his time and soul into the game, even bypassing parental internet restrictions to keep playing. But I played as the underdog, quietly fighting battles no one else could see. As a skoliosexual, upper-middle-class, sober-curious woman trying to prove she belongs, winning isn’t about ego. It’s about worth. I only received one vote all game. My own, cast on a day I wasn’t sure I deserved to exist. And still, I stayed.