by accident in line for the bathroom at the airport a few months ago LMAOOOOO. He was actually quite kind I was wearing a hoodie from the college I went to and he was like “oh did you go to school there!” And I was like “yes………but more importantly are you Tucker Carlson?” and he was like “lol yeah!!” and I was like LMAOOOOO Ure joe king my life is such a meme………… and I asked for a selfie because I wanted to post it on tiktok as a joke with the background sound where he goes “woke M&Ms have returned… the green M&M got her boots back and is now a lesbian,,, maybe?” LMAOOOOO it would have gone viral but when I was in my uber I was like well I better not because then I can never go on love island LMAOOOOOOOOOOO so every time I scroll thru my camera roll on a flight out of boredom I always come across the photo of me and Tucker Carlson ………….. I can’t bring myself to delete it LMAOOOOOOO not me getting served Fox News realness in the airport restroom …

Had a baby the other day and the name she chose to give it is so awful I feel compelled to call CPS………………but her husband proposed to her at someone’s else’s wedding so I suppose we knew good judgement was not in the cards !!!!

LMAOOOOO and people will tell me I’m jealous that my city isn’t putting up NBA Ws but truthfully I’m OVER ITTT and what’s even worse is seeing all these people I know with the smallest most minuscule connection to New York City trying to enact this stolen valor and join in on the celebration LMAOOOOOOOO it’s giving bandwagon it’s giving fake fan and as I said it’s giving stolen valor !!!!!!!!! like calm down Amanda you’ve lived in southern Illinois for the past 22 years and no your grandfather being from the Bronx doesn’t count LMAOOOOOOOOOO

but internet people are getting sort of weird about it LMAOOOOOO like I saw it in theaters and very much enjoyed it but it’s getting into weirdly overrated territory dare I say people are OBSESSED LMAOOOO……………like yes the movie was good but it was certainly not a genre-defining film or anything of the sort … we can appreciate it without the unnecessary and over the top glaze … I feel like im missing the memo on why people are treating it as if it’s so groundbreaking !!!!!!!

Tell me why I ordered a book on MAY 16TH of the year of our lord 2026 and it tells me it will take four weeks to arrive… okay whatever!! I’m reading the stand by Stephen King which is like 1100 pages so I can occupy myself until then fine fine FINE. anyway today was supposed to be the big day and I was excited because getting a book in the mail is one of life’s simplest pleasures and I was all giddy and everything!!! WELL NO. I check my Amazon app and it now says JULY 8 - JULY 14?!?!? 60 DAYS FROM THE PURCHASE DATE PRACTICALLY????! Johannes gutenberg did NOT invent the printing press for it to take TWO MONTHS to receive a book from Amazon which BEGAN AS A BOOK STORE MIND YOU!!!!!!!! like good god above are they writing my copy by hand over there!!! What is going on!!!!!

I honestly get so annoyed when I see tiktoks or other social media posts about people working from home doing nothing all day LMAOOOOOOO like please send me your company’s LinkedIn job postings I will LITERALLY upload my resume and then manually input it into the workday web page and even craft an AI generated cover letter just for the chance to interview LMAOOOOOOOOO im not kidding btw………i work from home and I am literally SWEATING sometimes like at the end of the day I feel physically in pain and fully ill as if I’ve just done a full body workout…… yesterday I could not even find time to eat a PROTEIN BAR between 6.5 hours of meetings that I’m working DURING because I have so many drafts to finish by the end of the day LMAOOOOOO im laughing but it’s not funny yall….. WHERE are these jobs where you don’t have people calling u begging u for things at all hours do tell……………im away from my work laptop until Sunday night and im honestly scared to even have this much time away LMAOOO

but the finna is gag sis im dead as a chile

Is to see Internet people finally understand when to use the word “less” vs when to use the word “fewer” LMAOOOOOOOOOO literally less vs. fewer has its foot on yalls NECKS like GET UPPPPPPPPPP ref do something i can’t ….

In Uruguay and honestly the biggest indicator that my frontal lobe has finished developing since then is when I watch the video LMAOOOOOOO like genuinely palms sweating heart pounding what the FUCK was I thinking LMAOOOOOOOOO but when I was 22 I was like oh ya whatev.

and felt something tingling my back and I look in the mirror and there’s a SPIDER CRAWLING ON MY SHOULDER BLADE literally hyperventilating throwing up screaming and crying. Stepping away for a few hours to focus on my healing journey I hope yall understand

i had a random hankering to play minecraft for the first time in approx 4 years so I go launch minecraft on my trusty old mac.... and WHAT DO YOU KNOW i get some nonsense about needing a "microsoft account" or whatev to play it which honestly has me shaking because now im supposed to spend another $30 to purchase it?!!!?!?!? this is highway robbery!!!!!

the last THREE TIMES I’ve been to the movie theater I get there and some LOSER family or couple or WHOEVER is in the seat I SPECIFICALLY picked for myself on the app………. Now I’m already at the movies alone so I don’t need people thinking I’m some sort of aggressor or whatever so I just sit somewhere else but here I am about to see Backrooms in the FRONT FUCKING ROW………… just like I had to do with Obsession like im honestly so tired….. anyway what did we think of Backrooms NO SPOILERS!

on stolen blogs pages. Argue with a wall!

in the past month. I almost started crying in the bathroom stall at the airport plz stab me someone

i DO think i just fell out of a coconut tree.

I’m at my apartment pool rn and this group of ppl who are probably like 2 years younger than me (I’m only 26 don’t age me) are being so loud and they’re like “OMG we did LIKE SOOOO much molly last night and EVERYONE THREW UP it was CRAZY but YOU THREW UP from the JUNGLE JUICE not the MOLLY” and there’s a mid thirties couple next to me who clearly heard them so I turn to them and go “yeah we all like TOTALLY THREW UP from all the MOLLY” and they laughed and gave me a free beer. You neckbeard losers could never play an irl social game like me honestly

Why all the tiktok AI content revolves around fruit people LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO like genuinely ………… every time I get something on my page that is AI fruit I’m like WHY when will vegetables get their turn !!!!!!!

is literally a form of torture for me . Like yes maybe I’m just miserable and single but i truly cannot stand it LMAOOOOO like if I got captured by jigsaw and find myself in the next saw movie it would be me surrounded by endless tiktok content of millennial and Gen Z brides talking about where they placed the flowers at their reception or how they chose bridesmaids’ dresses or “omg here are 10 things i would have done differently for my wedding as a 2025 bride” or “omg my photographer totally messed up my first look with the groomsmen photo im so disappointed” like LMAOOOOOOOOOOO shoot me shoot me shoot me shoot me just shoot me i can’t handle it . It has the same energy as posting on linkedin I can’t explain and will not elaborate just STFU PLEASE