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Klique Emblem

Points: 798 551st

Monthly: 63 290th

Rating: 1000

Games: 232

Last Seen: 23 mins

Hello. I used to be a blue barracuda and the sultan of spices. Now I'm just a bunch of malarkey.
Profile Visits: 1285

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Gameplayers

Malarkey      ❤ 21   ▲328th of March 2026

I'm sick of the fucking gameplayers on this site. All they do is snake around and pretend to be your best mate when really all they're interested in is the $K cheque at the end. It's disgusting. Let me tell you something gameplayers: You will NEVER be ready. Remember I told you. I'm keepin it REAL.

Hysteria #16698: The Miracle on Ice (and Pixels)

Malarkey      ❤ 46   ▲26th of May 2026

FROM THE BRINK TO THE BANK — @DREAMFYRE SECURES THE TITLE! https://kovaze.com/Hysteria/16698 We have just witnessed a historic finish in the Hysteria arena. While the 'Premade Alliance' fell like dominoes in the early rounds, their final member managed to survive the wreckage and prevail in a stunning 6-1 jury landslide. The Final Play-by-Play: The MVP: @Dreamfyre. She didn't just survive; she thrived. After her teammates fell like dominoes, she put the team on her back, secured the high-score HOH, and proved that a tactical "quiet game" is often the deadliest. The Heartbreak: @aries. A masterclass in timing. She snatched the final HOH and made the gut-wrenching decision to cut @Bowler23. While the jury went for Dream, aries’ "Final Assassin" run will go down in the highlight reels. The Fan Favorite: The crowd has spoken! @Malarkey takes home the People's Choice for bringing the play-by-play energy all season long. Stat of the Night: 6 to 1. That isn't just a score; it’s a statement. The jury rewarded the grind, the resilience, and the "Sole Survivor" narrative. The Scouts' Final Word: Season #16698 started with "premade" drama and ended with a legendary solo performance. A massive salute to @bradi for being the season’s definitive 'Enforcer,' and to the rest of the cast—@Wankster5, the Fallen Captain, @Oren, the Executive, @Nora the Reliable Wing, @DQDiva143 the social spark, @Babygirl91 the moral compass and vet, and @shavedboosie the chaos agent, who provided the tactical depth and social spark that made this a true arena classic." @Malarkey, signing off. See you next season! 🎙️🏆

staying still

Malarkey      ❤ 36   ▲25th of May 2026

they all say this place is just a game, but all i see is the light you bring to it. i’ll stay here ‘til morning if it means sitting under the glow of the screen with you. the arena was a blur, but 2nd place looks like a win from where i’m sitting. proud of you for every move you made, @cherry, i’ll say i love you and mean it this time. say sorry for everything else. you know i think about you all the time. now that we're both out of the heat, let's just stay still for a while. i'm happy right here in the quiet.

This may be an unpopular opinion

Malarkey      ❤ 57   ▲35th of May 2026

But the surge of new people from Roblox have been kind of refreshing and nice to have around. There's an infused energy around here and it has been a welcome change and not just refugees from tengaged and/or zwooper. I feel like all I see are people bitching and whining about the new people or calling them annoying or just complaining, but I will take all of them over people like gagaluv. Each are different and have dynamic personalities. Some better than others. I just love the banter they have already and it reminds me of when The Challenge added the Brits and non-MTV people in. It changed the show. I hope we continue to grow and it's not just a life raft of the old sites. Love meeting new people and having people who aren't automatically better than me at every challenge (but many still are). I am hoping for an influx of Redditors or TikTokers next.

I am jealous of pretty girls

Malarkey      ❤ 75   ▲45th of May 2026

Like my new hair? Just got it. thanks @tide.

I know we're all thinking it

Malarkey      ❤ 57   ▲44th of May 2026

But the @Amandasings04 Big Brother blogs are just a giant circle-jerk for people who think they’re actual celebrities. They’re "interviewing" each other in Dubai-themed houses and rating each other's avatars like it's the Met Gala, but it’s really just 13 people in a Discord chat arguing about who has a "leaking bussy" while clicking balloons in your pajamas. You aren't on CBS, you're on Kovaze. The "house reveals" are just Pinterest boards, and the "gameplay" is just whoever can stay awake longest in a Discord chat. If I see one more "exit interview" for someone who played for two days and did nothing but post PYNs, I’m calling brookie from the circus to come collect their missing performers. I fucking love it though and cannot get enough of it.