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My Kovaze family

KaliMinaj 4 months ago158 views

Dear Kovaze Family, I just wanted to take a moment to appreciate the wonderful people who make this family so special... and by special, I mean completely chaotic. Connor, my grandpa, thank you for reminding me every single day that age is just a number when you're busy destroying me in Arena and Race. Jaded, my little brother, world champion of blaming race partners. Somehow every loss is everyone else's fault, yet every win mysteriously belongs to him. MaxOra, my mother, thank you for remembering I exist every 10 months. Seeing your messages is like spotting a rare legendary event. TheCEO, my dog. I spend more time rescuing you in Arena than actually playing the game. If there was an award for being carried, you'd have ten of them. Dimitra, my sister, who somehow always looks better dressed than me and keeps buying clothes like she's personally funding the fashion industry. itsamodernlife, my older brother and the role model of the family. The rest of us make mistakes so he can continue looking perfect. Guib, my second dog. If barking was an Olympic sport, you'd have more gold medals than the entire family combined. Gabs, my stepmother, thank you for the occasional clothes, the company, and for tolerating this circus we call a family. HarryP and Goomybear, my gay friends. The most inseparable duo in Kovaze history. If one appears, the other is never more than three seconds away. Honestly, you two have spent so much time together that people are starting to wonder if you're sharing the same account. AMANDA, my aunt and the undisputed Blog Queen of Kovaze. If there’s gossip, drama, fashion news, or a random potato sighting, Amanda has already written three articles about it. Beni, my daughter. She was born via C-section and already making dramatic entrances into the family lore. The only mystery bigger than her DNTM activity schedule is… who her father is, because honestly, nobody knows and we’ve all stopped asking. Lasty, AngieKstan and Lolicapolica, my cousins. Somehow they're always dressed like they're walking a red carpet while I'm dressed like I lost a bet. We always end up meeting in Arena, and every time we play together it's all good vibes, good chats, and me pretending I wasn't just getting destroyed five minutes earlier. Love you all. Even the ones who keep beating me, ignoring me, barking at me, dressing better than me, or blaming everyone else for their losses. Your favourite family member, (Probably) KaliMinaj
23 votes, 272 points

Comments



CarltonRS4 months ago

Mom

Gabs4 months ago

Amoooo você ❤️

TheCEO4 months ago

UR DOGGY <3

guib4 months ago

KKKKKKKKKK CADELA

KaliMinaj4 months ago

guib Kkkkk amo vc

BeniMod4 months ago

HELPPPPP AT MINE ?? OMG no u are truly my mother. u birthed me on kovaze kaliminaj legit my first ever friend and ally. i could never forget my minaj.

KaliMinaj4 months ago

Beni That’s so true let me re-write yours.

Chris4 months ago

ILYYYY

AngieKStan4 months ago

Cousins ❤️

lolicapolica4 months ago

AngieKStan us put together as we should causr we love KousinKali

KaliMinaj4 months ago

lolicapolica Kousin is a new word i love it

HarryP4 months ago

chosen family <3 ... now where the fuck is Goomy?

KaliMinaj4 months ago

HarryP He’s right behind you stop lying

HarryP4 months ago

KaliMinaj He is me

Jaded4 months ago

mom

Dimitra4 months ago

KaliMinaj 😂😂 ily soooo much 🫂🫂🫶🏼

Connor4 months ago

I love you so much <3