My wee Scott (I call him "wee" Scott because he's 5'3, 135ish...and here I am, a THICK girl, 5'8, 200...such a mismatch!) is coming over this morning to give me tattoo #4. My last tattoo was last month and I had Cole's name tattooed on my left inner forearm, it is "Cole" in Korean. https://ibb.co/hFGByJ5T Today I'm getting a butterfly with 3 hearts...the butterfly representing my sister Sherry, the 3 hearts represents my Dad who died in 2012, my nephew who died in 2022, and my uncle Paul who passed at the end of April. Its gonna go on my right inner forearm, same place as my Cole tattoo, just on the opposite arm. The tattoo: https://ibb.co/gMb041qD hehehe I'm excited Will post the final product when it's finished!

My father passed in 2012. My sister Sherry passed in 2021. I'm pretty sure that 97% of Kovaze will look at me crazy, but we had a fad diet in the 1980s called "Slim Fast" Slim Fast was a nutritional shake and it would always have this jingle in commercials: "Give us a week, and we'll take off the weight!" So one morning in 1988, I was in sixth grade and 12 years old. I was sitting at the kitchen table with my sister Sherry, and Sherry was tending to my niece Jess. Dad was at the blender and Sherry and I were just chatting away when we noticed Dad had a can of Slim Fast and was whipping something up. He made a TALL glass of the Slim Fast, sat down at the table, and my sister said to Dad,"That's Slim Fast? That stuff gives me GAS! And it tastes NASTY!" My Dad, the ever so proud chef, boasted, "Not mine, Sherry! I made this shake taste amazing!" So Sherry and I both asked for a sip. We both took a sip, and indeed, it tasted amazing! "WOW!" Sherry said to him. "That tastes amazing and does not taste like Slim Fast at all?! How did you do it and lose weight making it taste great?" Dad said "Well I haven't lost weight yet but I need to make it edible, so I put two scoops of French Vanilla ice cream in the blender with the Slim Fast." And people wonder why we are a fat family.... 🤣🤣 ✌🏻

Because my boo is coming over tonight. Getting the White Trash Millionaire house ready for some companionship....

and is functioning for me!

Who remembers the Josh Gotti/kenyanbirthcertficategenerator scandal? I'm still so 💀 that I actually discovered it. Memories. holy shit. What a dumpster fire. Edit: Please let me know when Discord is fully functional. Time is money!! Edit #2: I'm gonna be spending a little more time on Kovaze since my caregiving days for the elderly are over, so feel free to hit me up on Discord: tinabeenaluvsu Snap: tinaistrouble

doing something *similar to T-Brother hahaha {edited because I'm stoned and can't grammar} to be continued....

I haven't done it in a while but I'm thinking about doing some recorded Tarot readings/Mediumship cards. Hmmm. Anyone interested? I have done this before, but I got overwhelmed, so I'll just go with the first 5 people, if people even post on here haha It will be this afternoon. I will send you a link in your mail or if I have you on Discord. No one will see it except you & I or if you want to share it. xx ✌🏻

Pros: •I have lost a total of 265 pounds •I can walk 5 miles per day •I can actually bathe myself and stand up in the shower •My clothes went from 6XL to L •My skin has cleared up •I walked on the beach last July for the first time in over 20 years. •I no longer walk with a cane or have sleep apnea Cons: •I cannot eat a lot of food and I throw up...a lot. •Ulcers. My own doing though. My first day post op I sparked up a joint. Yep, got an ulcer. Recovered from that one, and then got another one from drinking August to February hahaha again, my own doing. •Small bowel obstructions. I've had one, right before they diagnosed my first ulcer. I have A LOT of endoscopies. My next one is scheduled for the 19th of this month. •My hair thins and falls out every now and then. •Malnutrition is common. When I was hospitalized in February for my bleeding ulcer, they had to give me a feeding tube via LARGE IV because my new stomach would not handle a regular feeding tube. I was very very sick. •My face has gotten really old with weight loss. All in all, it's worth it, honestly. Sometimes I go into a bit of a depressive episode about food, but I get over it. When I first had surgery, I would CRY if I saw anyone eating something I couldn't have. Seeing my weight going down week after week helped me. (Until they started handing out ice cream sandwiches at the psych ward) •Lots and lots of loose skin. I am having skin removal surgery (hopefully) this summer/fall. I am getting a tummy tuck and thighplasty. Insurance will cover it because it's medically necessary. (breakdown and I need 2 new knees) The only thing I would change about this journey would be that I would have done it a lot sooner than 46 years old. Here's to my Skinny Bitch Era. ✌🏻

I am laid up with a bum foot so I'll just be spacing out, blogging, and gaming. Stop fucking evicting me goddammit. 🖤 lmao I also must say reconnecting with Vanili was amazing...good times. Y'all Be nice or I'll burn your panties. ✌🏻

Or perhaps a financial depression? I am saving up koinz to gift some friends, but fuck....with these goddamn shop prices I'm going to need a second fucking job. props to Dimitra for keeping it at 900 with some nice stuff in her shop. The rest of you shop owners? Shame shame. I get making a buck, but the goddamn prices went SKY FUCKING HIGH in the matter of weeks. Are there tariffs on pixels now? Because I don't get it....

Another tragedy in the Sicotte household. I have been caring for my elderly mother (she'll be 80 on Thursday) and her brother, (my uncle) who is 78 and has special needs. I have been caring for them on a pretty consistent basis since I moved back in with my mother in 2014. Friday night, my uncle Paul was acting very strange. We asked him if he felt sick and he shook his head and said he was tired and just wanted to sleep. He started shaking and acting veryyy strange. I took his blood pressure and it was 54/39. I immediately called an ambulance. He is in septic shock due to aspirational pneumonia. We thought he had a cold and had been giving him Tylenol and DayQuil for 3 days now. It turned out he aspirated on his drink and developed pneumonia. By the time the symptoms presented, he was in septic shock. He will not recover, so my mother (and her two surviving sisters...one I can't really stand but that's another story for another blog) made the decision to stop his treatments today and let him pass. I've had way too much loss in my life, especially recently. The cycles of 3 continue.... Fuck 2026. 😭😭😭

if you think I'm paying those prices for pixels 🤣🤣 Fuck that. I'll be back in a month lol Maybe the Kovaze recession will let up a bit....

I leave for like a month and now Kovaze is in a fucking recession!

Do me a favor: Direct that bitch here: https://ibb.co/JWhbZPMM And please ask her if I look like I have swallowed myself now. 💋 I have turned into a raging, bitter bitch. LOL

https://imgur.com/a/PlQHO6r My (updated) before and after pic....the one on the left was September 2020 at my highest recorded weight of 455. (Possibly more because my scale was begging for fresh batteries) and the one on the right is me today (Well Saturday) at 188 pounds. I'm glad Two Ton Tina is no more. That petty skinny bitch you see now....that is me. lol Anyone else got transformation pics? Sometimes I like going on reddit and just surfing for Before/After pics. It makes me incredibly proud that I was able to actually do it, after years of being told how fat, ugly, and what a waste of space I was. ✌🏻 EDIT: If anyone sees SKANKCLAIR be sure to forward this to her. Ms "Tina looks like she swallowed herself" bitchhhhhh. Ok I'm done LOL

life has been so ehhhh I literally broke down crying at the grocery store cash register last night because I was short $2. How embarrassing. Some lady who was behind me in line, I have never ever met, started rubbing my back and said "You're going through it, aren't you?" Yes lady, I sure fucking am. She paid the $2 I was short and I wanted to fucking die of embarrassment. I'm gonna stare at my computer screen today and zone out; maybe learn how to play a fucking Arena game. Or any game really. I need to just zone out. ✌🏻

So I broke up with my boyfriend Erik. We were together for quite a bit....we met in November, right before my 48th birthday. So technically we've been together since before Thanksgiving...like November 21st, so roughly 3.5 months, which is a long-ass time for me. LOL I wasn't feeling it....I know this sounds so terrible....we were long distance and he was (or is) in a wheelchair. He's a big dude but if you know me....I don't judge, considering I used to be 500 pounds. I was definitely an upgrade from his last relationship. So I decided to use the excuse of distance to break up, but I think he saw right fucking through it. I told him I still wanted to talk and be friends...he did not. And right before he blocked me, Cole (who was actually pretty pissed that we broke up; he liked Erik a lot) messaged me a screenshot from his Facebook and he had a post "I STAND WITH ISRAEL" Soooo Cole wasn't upset anymore. So I'm single again and I have decided not to jump into another relationship. I want to be single and have both sexes chase me. It's a really weird feeling. I just have to remember NOT to settle!

a pair of bonded fancy male rats. They are soooo super cute. 🐁 My mom is so gullible though..initially I told her that I was getting Cole the rats and she said "I DO NOT WANT RATS IN MY HOUSE!" and no matter how much I explained to her that they are domesticated, do not carry diseases, live in a multi-level cage, and are very intelligent....she didn't want no damn rats in this house. So, me being the sly person I can be, got the rats while I was in the hospital and I told my mother "They are a pair of giant fancy gerbils" 🤣🤣 So when the "boys" as I call them now (Andrew & Ivan) came home (Cole's good friend from NH went and picked him up 2 rats from a breeder and all the necessary accessories...including a 3 tier cage!! $50 for everything!!) my mother peeked in to the cage and commented how long their tails were. 🤣🤣 So last night I went into her room and confessed...they are actually fancy male rats. She took it better than I thought she would. She said "keep them away from me" Gladly obliged. haha I hope everyone has a wonderful day. ✌🏻

in our city hospital.... My key takeaway from this hospital stint? I gotta stop drinking. Like, no more. Doneeeee. I had a bleeding ulcer...I had to have an emergency endoscopy and the surgeon had to cauterize my ulcer because it was bleeding. I was supposed to come home Monday, but then Sunday night, my blood pressure started CRASHING. At one point it was 82/40. I also presented with malnutrition....I was starting to grow light soft hair (called lanugo) on my face from malnourishment. I FINALLY started feeling better toady. I was good yesterday, but then I had a sudden onset of nausea and started puking everywhere...and then my bp started bottoming out AGAIN. They wanted to keep me another night (for tonight) but I was SO FUCKING ANNOYED by this point...8 days of being poked, prodded, doped up on pain meds...having every little movement tracked with a heart monitor...having very little to eat because of being sick....I was SO OVER IT. I told the doctor this morning that I was over it and she needed to get what she needed because I want OUT TODAY. I was discharged at 5:15pm and was so annoyed I was ready to rip my own IV out. At 2:40pm I told the nurse that I needed pain medication before I went home. "Yep." 5pm comes and she comes into the room "Would you like your Latuda?" (my night med for my biplolar disorder) Me: NOPE. I want you to take my IV out and I'll go home and take my Latuda with my pain medication that I requested two hours ago. It was a decent visit until today. But I finally left... I weighed 202 pounds when I went in on Monday night...I came home today at 188. The battle begins.... ✌🏻

I have been an inpatient since Tuesday. I spent 2 days in the Short Stay Unit and yesterday morning I was moved up into the main hospital and in to a regular room. I have lost massive amounts of weight so far and am so sick that they are planning on giving me a feeding tube today because I still cannot eat OR drink without having intense pain and feeling super sick. Because of my weight loss surgery, my stomach anatomy won't support a typical feeding tube so I need to have one placed by a PIC line technique in my arm. No more alcohol drinking for me. This sucks so much.