A Message To Coke

Frostbite 14th of October 2025

Oh, Coke? Please. The only thing fizzing about you is your ego. You show up to every game acting like you’re the main character, but your storyline’s flatter than day-old soda. You talk big in DMs, but crumble the second someone actually challenges you — you’re basically the carbonated version of background noise. Every time you try to make a move, it’s giving “store brand cola pretending to be name brand.” At this point, I’m not even mad — I’m just embarrassed for you. You’ve been around forever, but somehow you’re still giving “warm two-liter no one wanted.” Anyway, I don’t do knockoffs. I prefer Pepsi. 🥤💅

8 votes, 17 points

Comments

Reported zachbbs

By Frostbite,

14th of October 2025

Oh Frostbite, you’re like a malfunctioning freezer — all hype, no chill. Every time you try to strategize, it’s like watching a penguin try to fly: awkward, confusing, and destined to crash. You claim to bring the frost, but honestly, you’re just the cold shoulder no one asked for. If being cold-hearted was a game, you’d still find a way to lose in the first round. Maybe next season you’ll thaw out and actually warm up to the idea of winning — or at least stop freezing up at the worst possible moments!

By Zachbbs,

14th of October 2025

Frostbites first spill

By KittyCupcake123,

14th of October 2025

Anyway, I don’t do knockoffs. I prefer Pepsi. 🥤💅

By Kemi,

14th of October 2025

LMFAOOOOOOOO not the ChatGPT read

By Coke,

14th of October 2025